My love is like a deep and placid lake... Not now, sweetie, Daddy's busy, OK? OK: my love's a deep and peaceful lake... Here, Daddy can fix it. All better. Now go play. Um, my love, yes—a rose that blooms in spring... You tell her Daddy says she has to share. My love's... My love's a lake that . . .
Sonnet 130: My Mistress’ Eyes are Nothing like the Sun
My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun; Coral is far more red than her lips' red; If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun; If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head. I have seen roses damasked, red and white, But no such roses see I in her cheeks; And in some perfumes is there . . .
Einstein’s Happiest Moment
Einstein's happiest moment occurred when he realized a falling man falling beside a falling apple could also be described as an apple and a man at rest while the world falls around them. And my happiest moment occurred when I realized you were falling for me, right down to the core, and . . .
To His Coy Mistress
Had we but world enough, and time, This coyness, Lady, were no crime. We would sit down and think which way To walk and pass our long love's day. Thou by the Indian Ganges' side Shouldst rubies find: I by the tide Of Humber would complain. I would Love you ten years before the Flood, And you . . .
Good Neighbors
He wondered how she knew about the Cheetos; he thought he'd washed the orange dust off clean. Did she note down each case of beef burritos the dry-ice truck delivered, sight unseen? And what about the Snickers bags? Did she use high-powered binoculars to scan? Did she note down each luscious . . .